May this marriage be full of laughter, our every day in paradise. – Rumi
What kind of problems do couples come into therapy with?
Couples enter therapy for a variety of reasons. Many partners are working to improve communication skills, stop fighting so much, struggles with intimacy (both emotional and physical), dealing with the devastation created by affairs, infidelity and breaches of trust, how to work through issues together, and wanting to feel closer and more connected to their partner.
What therapy models are used?
Together, we can come up with a clear set of relationship goals to bring back the spark that will meet each other’s physical and emotional needs. I use strong communication and non-blaming approaches, such as theories from Gottman, Emotional Focused Therapy, and Imago Therapy.
How often should we expect to come?
I like to see couples initially once per week so we can get things moving forward. Or we can schedule a double session to have more time to work on issues. I can work with you on your timing and budget.
How long will we be in therapy?
That depends on you, what issues you bring in, and your level of commitment to working together to resolve issues and past trauma that often gets triggered in a significant relationship with our partner. The average length of time is between 10-15 sessions.
Does couples therapy really work?
62% of therapists agreed that the number 1 cause for failure in therapy is the lack of effort from one or both parties. Based on feedback at the conclusion of therapy from my clients, they say it is not easy but therapy works. Couples often report improving communication skills, repairing unresolved wounds, and learning about their own and their partner’s emotional responses and making sense of them, just to name a few.
Will therapy improve our sex life?
80% of therapists have reported that counseling leads their clients to “more sex.”
Basically, if you have a satisfying relationship, your sex life tends to be largely satisfying too. A disconnected, conflicted or distant relationship can be a formidable barrier for a healthy sex life. I work at assisting clients to improve communication and be more vulnerably expressive in a safe environment and thus regain the emotional connection that is necessary for a more satisfying physical connection.
Read more about the common challenges couples face and some important coping skills in my Couple Therapy Blog >
Couples Counseling in San Diego, California
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